railroadsoftware:

person: so what have you been up to
me: (speaking very humble) well, I just got some new carpet.. it’s plush…
person: (trying not to sound envious) pl… plush? wow. I hear thats the nicest of all carpets
me: oh it’s nothing..

19,215 notes

debilitati0n:

bettervillains:

life-at-taco-bell:

You would think that teenagers would be the rudest customers when really it’s mostly old, middle-aged people. 

  

The elderly are either adorable or the wrinkly reincarnation of Satan there is no in between

431,580 notes

cockringtoss:

hearing teachers swear keeps me young

431,687 notes

thearcanetheory:

cianur00:

sam-winchester-cries-during-sex:

f-r-eckled:

im like 25% funny and 85% bad at math

that’s 110%

image

thats the best gif I’ve ever seen for this kind of thing

653,598 notes

misotrashy:

knitmeapony:

ONE TWEET. THIS FIT IN ONE TWEET. IF YOU FUCK IT UP YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE.

So much of this. An apology is NOT “I’m sorry BUT here’s why I’m totally in the right and think I did nothing wrong.”

sofiaauditores:

*inhales* what a beautiful day *exhales* to play video games for 15 hours straight

295,313 notes

officialunitedstates:

I feel like there needs to be more words that start with x.  X really got the short end of the stick here.  X is a nice letter and deserves more material to work with

2,322 notes

andriznayy:

Me whenever my professors open their mouths.
"We looked at each other a little too long to be ‘just friends’."(via hefuckin)

197,624 notes

angelicsongx:

nihilisme:

ittybittylittleworld:

punkasslouis:

I just watched a kid break down in the bookstore because his books for the semester totaled $600 and that’s the american university system in a nutshell

I was on the verge of tears when I got to the cashier so yeah, that’s messed up

Go here and just, don’t waste any more money okay?

YES. I FOUND THE THING, IF ANYONE DOESN’T HAVE MONEY FOR COLLEGE TEXT BOOKS LIKE ME, THEN GO HERE OKAY?

280,050 notes

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